Thank you for posting this. I too never learned to deal with death. My dad died when I was 11 and my mom did what she thought was the right thing to do - try and make my life as "normal" as possible. I never processed the grief and it came out in strange ways over the years until my brother in law died. I grieved for him and for my dad for about a year.
When my mom died last year, I spent a lot of the days before she died grieving but once she actually did die, it took a while to set in. We had a memorial service that my cousin (who's a priest) did and it was a true and meaningful closure. He knew my mom very well and had visited her quite a bit over the past year.
I think most people don't know how to deal with the grief that comes with the passing of a friend. I know with few exceptions, I'm not real close to a lot of my actual related family. My family by choice is a far bigger part of my life, along with my fannish family. I'm glad to hear that society may be starting to acknowledge that.
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branchandroot
Thank you Wendy
Date: 2011-01-26 07:45 pm (UTC)When my mom died last year, I spent a lot of the days before she died grieving but once she actually did die, it took a while to set in. We had a memorial service that my cousin (who's a priest) did and it was a true and meaningful closure. He knew my mom very well and had visited her quite a bit over the past year.
I think most people don't know how to deal with the grief that comes with the passing of a friend. I know with few exceptions, I'm not real close to a lot of my actual related family. My family by choice is a far bigger part of my life, along with my fannish family. I'm glad to hear that society may be starting to acknowledge that.