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Scaring the straights
Aug. 18th, 2004 07:56 pmI wanted to write this down as soon as I got back from MiRF, but wanted to think about it first.
Now, anyone who has seen![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
jmthane and tarsa together for any length of time comments on how deliriously happy they are together. Sometimes it's a bit much, especially if you're flying solo, but no one can doubt that they are very much in love.
We were having dinnner at the Big Boy near the faire site on Saturday night. Josie & Nan were acting just like they always do - equal parts snuggly and wisecracking, lots of giggles and a few smooches. Nothing out of the ordinary. But I looked over at the next table, and there was a little boy, maybe 6 or 7, with this big-eyed stare. Sadly, I turned to Josie and said "I hate to have to say this, but you're scaring the straights".
Of course, they immediately backed off. We're not in sophisticated Chicago any more, and it didn't seem the place to get into anything with complete strangers. We were encouraged by the sort-of-shy smile that the boys mother gave them, but it sort of tainted the evening a bit.
The more I think about it, the more upset I get. The debate about gay marriage may be in the news, and that it an important issue, but the simple fact that two people in love have to worry about how people will react to them, that they have to 'monitor their behavior' in some way to avoid giving offense - there is something deeply and fundementally wrong about that.
My standard comment when telling people about them is "and since they are two ladies who are to be wed, they BOTH get sparkly rocks!" And all weekend I watched everyone (including very butch security women) go absolutely gooey when they learned about the engagement.
It just left a vaguely nasty taste in my mouth.
Now, anyone who has seen
jmthane and tarsa together for any length of time comments on how deliriously happy they are together. Sometimes it's a bit much, especially if you're flying solo, but no one can doubt that they are very much in love.We were having dinnner at the Big Boy near the faire site on Saturday night. Josie & Nan were acting just like they always do - equal parts snuggly and wisecracking, lots of giggles and a few smooches. Nothing out of the ordinary. But I looked over at the next table, and there was a little boy, maybe 6 or 7, with this big-eyed stare. Sadly, I turned to Josie and said "I hate to have to say this, but you're scaring the straights".
Of course, they immediately backed off. We're not in sophisticated Chicago any more, and it didn't seem the place to get into anything with complete strangers. We were encouraged by the sort-of-shy smile that the boys mother gave them, but it sort of tainted the evening a bit.
The more I think about it, the more upset I get. The debate about gay marriage may be in the news, and that it an important issue, but the simple fact that two people in love have to worry about how people will react to them, that they have to 'monitor their behavior' in some way to avoid giving offense - there is something deeply and fundementally wrong about that.
My standard comment when telling people about them is "and since they are two ladies who are to be wed, they BOTH get sparkly rocks!" And all weekend I watched everyone (including very butch security women) go absolutely gooey when they learned about the engagement.
It just left a vaguely nasty taste in my mouth.
