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Party report and generalized grousing
Dec. 14th, 2008 07:56 pmAll but 1 of the people who said they would show up did. Plus one person who had indicated they were ill called and said they were still ill, so no worries there. 2 people showed uptwenty minutes early (aside from the one who showed up yesterday).
We had 1 small pork pie left (because I didn't want it) and 3 small sausage rolls. Approximately 5 small slices of sausage and no cheese, and maybe 3 cups of the gallon of cider left. So in other words, when you ask people to RSVP and they actually DO, you can have almost the exact right amount of food! This is a very useful thing when the host hasn't got a lot of money/space/furniture.
I have no idea why "I'm having a party on this day at this time and I need to know by this other day of you're coming" is so hard for people to figure out? I even sent reminders the day before I needed to know that said "Look, I really need to know by tomorrow so that I have enough food and chairs", and it was like I was speaking a foreign language?
If you are invited to an event that asks for an RSVP, the following are acceptable answers:
The following are not acceptable answers:
I suppose that in a lot of cases not replying at all is assumed to mean "no", but it really is better to make actual contact, so that the host/ess knows you actually got the invite and haven't moved/changed e-mail addresses, etc. I learned that I had the wrong e-mail for someone I invited - a good thing to find out!
I'm all for "casual" , and I often have "drop-in" parties when people are welcome to just wander by if they are available, but were you people raised by wolverines or something? It's not about "these are the rules", but it's about respect. Someone has cared enough about you to invite you to their home and spend time and money to see that you have a good time. In return, your job is to not make things more difficult for them to do so. Respecting that people have lives and plans and those may not include waiting around for you to deign to inform them of your plans.
(A tangent on this - I firmly believe that if you have a regular weekly event, it is not necessary to call every week if you can't make it. I think it's perfectly acceptable to say "If I'm not there by x time (when x is within the general expected arrival time for people) assume I am not coming" because that is a simple if-then statement and no action or workaround is required on behalf of the host).
We had 1 small pork pie left (because I didn't want it) and 3 small sausage rolls. Approximately 5 small slices of sausage and no cheese, and maybe 3 cups of the gallon of cider left. So in other words, when you ask people to RSVP and they actually DO, you can have almost the exact right amount of food! This is a very useful thing when the host hasn't got a lot of money/space/furniture.
I have no idea why "I'm having a party on this day at this time and I need to know by this other day of you're coming" is so hard for people to figure out? I even sent reminders the day before I needed to know that said "Look, I really need to know by tomorrow so that I have enough food and chairs", and it was like I was speaking a foreign language?
If you are invited to an event that asks for an RSVP, the following are acceptable answers:
- Yes
- No
- I'm not sure but I'll let you know by Wednesday (or whatever day you will know)
- Yes and then calling to say "Actually something has come up - sorry" or "I'm still sick, so I'm staying home"
- No and then calling to say "My work thing got cancelled - would it be okay if I came by?"
The following are not acceptable answers:
- Well, maybe - I may go to this other thing that might be more interesting that yours.
- Not answering at all
I suppose that in a lot of cases not replying at all is assumed to mean "no", but it really is better to make actual contact, so that the host/ess knows you actually got the invite and haven't moved/changed e-mail addresses, etc. I learned that I had the wrong e-mail for someone I invited - a good thing to find out!
I'm all for "casual" , and I often have "drop-in" parties when people are welcome to just wander by if they are available, but were you people raised by wolverines or something? It's not about "these are the rules", but it's about respect. Someone has cared enough about you to invite you to their home and spend time and money to see that you have a good time. In return, your job is to not make things more difficult for them to do so. Respecting that people have lives and plans and those may not include waiting around for you to deign to inform them of your plans.
(A tangent on this - I firmly believe that if you have a regular weekly event, it is not necessary to call every week if you can't make it. I think it's perfectly acceptable to say "If I'm not there by x time (when x is within the general expected arrival time for people) assume I am not coming" because that is a simple if-then statement and no action or workaround is required on behalf of the host).
