because this needs to be shared...

Lovecraftian School Board Member Wants Madness Added To Curriculum

(yes it's The Onion)

"West has served on the school board since 1997, when he defeated 89-year-old incumbent Doris Pesce by promising to enforce dress codes and refer repeat disciplinary cases to the three-lobed burning eye. He has run unopposed ever since...All of West's remaining proposals were tabled so the board could debate repairing the hole in the locker-room wall, as five students have disappeared in the adjacent skull-filled catacombs since the opening was discovered last week"

Still not getting proper electric bills

Received yet another bill from ComEd for nine dollars and change for delivery fees but no actual electric usage. Called again so that I could have it on my record that I've been trying to get them to fix it.

They have a "Stuck Meter" service code on the account from 1/5 so apparently they did eventually manage to get into the basement after their first visit in December when they couldn't, but apparently no one has made it out to actually DO anything about this yet.

This has been going on since I bought the place in September. I get a $0 bill, I call. I get the next $0 bill I wait, since even if they DID fix it it would take a while for the billing to be fixed. Then I get another $0 bill, so I call, and then another one and I wait.

I KNOW the thing is spinning, as I checked when ashtalet helped me get my circuit breakers labeled a few weeks ago.

I just hate this "waiting for the other shoe to fall" feeling. I have NO idea how much my bills are supposed to be per month - I switched all the bulbs to CFCs except 2 but I have an electric stove now. People in my building seem to pay anything from $17-$40. I sent ComEd $200 from my tax refund to try to cushion the shock when they finally DO sort this out, in case I get a whopping huge bill.

This one's NOT from The Onion

Dalek Found Submerged in Pond

"He said: "We made a very thorough search of the rest of the bottom of the pond and there were definitely no alien remnants lurking."

Someone call Torchwood!