As proof that I have a little too much time on my hands right now

[wendyzski]

Being on the 3rd floor would give me a starting advantage in the event of the zombie apocalypse. Both stairwells are easily destroyable - the back ones made of wood and the front one while also wood is also narrow relatively easy to barricade. There is a rental tenant on the first floor who would provide a useful distraction and the second floor unit is empty, allowing it to be used as insulation or possible death trap against murderous fellow survivors. There is also a narrow alley, allowing for possible construction of upper level walkways to nearby buildings. A lack of nearby sources of food would be an issue, so allying with another survivor group would be necessary, but I should withstand the initial onslaught in fairly good shape.

The velociraptors would have it a bit easier in one way - while the approaches are clearly visible, there is a back fence that could be used to access the upper floors, although the top being covered in razor wire would help at the beginning. Again the easy-to-destroy stairwells would come into play as well as the nicely round doorknobs. The front stairwell would be comparatively simple to block with delaying barricades until the creatures give up (the "I don't have to run faster than the bear, I have to run faster than YOU" theory), and if they got up the back stairs there is really only one window to worry about, and it is of a size to be easily blocked by the refrigerator. The only other window on to the back porch area is made of glass bricks with a comparatively small opening for ventillation - again more likely to result in the creatures giving up and returning to eat the first floor tenant.

Comments

[wendyzski.livejournal.com]

Really - I mean, it's just a bit of sensible advance planning....

[jcw-da-dmg.livejournal.com]

Um . . . yeah . . .

[woody-whistler.livejournal.com]

As if making a home toddler-proof wasn't complicated enough...!

[surlywench.livejournal.com]

i made the same mental notes when i moved in with C. he was like "what are you thinking about??" one day as i was staring at the big glass french doors with a frown. "this place is totally indefensible..." i sighed.

he lets stuff like that just pass, lol.

[wendyzski.livejournal.com]

Srsly. You just do a little sensible advance planning and everyone starts to back away slowly....

[surlywench.livejournal.com]

inorite?

:sigh:

they'll learn.

[ashtalet.livejournal.com]

Now that you've considered zombies, you should also make sure you're protected from ninjas, pirates, robots, and monkeys. Ninjas are surprisingly easy to deter (a simple "No Ninjas 2am-5am" sign will usually suffice), pirates depend on your nearness to the coast, but robots and (especially) monkeys can be considerably more difficult.

As for me, my new building does not seem overly defensible - there's no back entrance to my unit, which is both good and bad, and if I remember correctly, there's two sets of stairs plus the elevator once you get past either of the two glass doors. That said, if I can keep them out of the unit itself (see the refrigerator), I might be okay for a while. Monkeys will be next to impossible to keep out, though, and a giant robot (or other giant monster) would pretty much ruin my day.

[jcw-da-dmg.livejournal.com]

Pirates? Just put up a conspicuous cross. They'll think it's a church and back away slowly.

[wendyzski.livejournal.com]

what about pirate bunnies?

[ashtalet.livejournal.com]

I can't see the picture, but in your case the threat from pirate bunnies would seem to be internal, and I don't see how you will possibly be able to defend against it.

[axegrrl.livejournal.com]

Put a photo of Pepper, appropriately dressed in (or Photoshopped with) eyepatch, etc., on a sign with verbage like "Previously plundered by Cptn. Pepper", possibly with a subtile "Leave tribute here."

[countessof-roth.livejournal.com]

ha ha. If we get attacked by zombies, we're good. Both staircases are narrow and easily destroyed.

Velociraptors.... we're toast. we're human pate on toast.

[cozit.livejournal.com]

Naw... it's not the too much time (wow, that *would* be good, wouldn't it?) it's the too much imagination ??

(hmm... actually I don't think there's such a thing as too much imagination... as long as you know who's *really* in charge of where it leads :-)

(of course, *my* imagination keeps trying to place you in Hunt Valley for CostumeCon next year...)